Wednesday, September 19, 2007


I constantly wonder why people are offering condolences to me instead of congratulations. I'm getting married, and it's the most thrilling, wonderful thing I can think of- yet somehow, people all around me think it's the end of my life.

When did marriage get so screwed up? When did it start being the end of your life? When did it mean "giving up your dreams and freedom" and wearing a ball and chain? I mean really, I thought that didn't happen until you had kids.

But seriously! What's wrong with men these days?

Dudes! If you really think all that shit, don't get married! You shouldn't be getting hitched to somebody who's trying to cut your balls off anyway, if that's really what she's trying to do. However, don't press your bitterness toward matrimony off on me. I'm not having it.

Still, it's not hard to see what the problem is. When we stop giving and start thinking about what we're getting out of our relationships, instead of what we're giving, we start being dissatisfied, and thinking that our significant other is somehow "depriving" us of the love and joy that we used to have. And maybe they are, because they don't feel loved anymore. So they start caring about themselves, and using your "devotion" as a weapon to punish you for the love you're not giving them any longer.

Until it falls apart.

Selfishness is human nature, and two can never become one flesh if they indulge that nature. Only when we can deny our self and become something new do we have the true ability to sacrifice and love. Consider this:

That, in reference to your former manner of life, you lay aside the old self, which is being corrupted in accordance with the lusts of deceit, and that you be renewed in the spirit of your mind, and put on the new self, which in the likeness of God has been created in righteousness and holiness of the truth.
-Ephesians 4:22-24

If God is love, we move closer to loving like He loves us when we are renewed in His Spirit.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

i agree. i noticed on wedneday night a couple weeks ago, a guy came up to you and said something like, "good luck, i've been married for 35 years." in a not so happy way. and you were like, "congratulations, that's great." i could tell by the tone of both of your voices what you were thinking, and i had the same feeling. i couldn't understand why he made it sound so negative. i'm really happy for you and rene and i wish you both the greatest happiness in the world. you deserve it.