So I've decided. I need attention.
Not all the time, just sometimes. In fact, sometimes I hate attention. I'm typically very uncomfortable with praise. I don't really enjoy being recognized in public. Increasingly, I'm less and less drawn to people in general.
I believe there's something in every human that longs to be chased after- the unfortunate side-effect of that is that you must run away to be chased. After running and running and hoping that somebody is chasing me, I often find that I'm alone, in the middle of nowhere. My would be pursuers looked at my full sprint in to the woods and said, "That guy does NOT want to be caught. I'll just wait here." Or perhaps they start running into the forest too, not to chase me, but because they want to be chased as well.
So then I end up running into a bunch of crazy, narcissistic spriniters in a forest. And I'm forced to walk back out into the open, head hung low because the game of hide and go seek ended 45 minutes ago and everyone decided I was too hard to find and went inside to eat ice cream instead.
So now what? I'm the fastest sprinter and the best hider in the game, but it doesn't matter, because nobody had the energy to seek me out. So instead of being championed for my speed, cunning and prowess, I'm left crying inside the bottom of a dead tree because nobody could find me and because they ran out of vanilla ice cream while I was sitting in my arrogant fantasy that soon, someone would scream, "Here he is! I found him!" and I would finally, thankfully, willingly lose this lifelong game of hide and seek.
Somebody find me.